Saturday, April 30, 2005

Meany Ol' Meany Spammer Mail

I always read the names of spammer mails and find much cheap humor there. I currently receive about 100 of these mails every day in three accounts. Carry the one and you will see that is about 300 of these wonderful mails every stinking day. Here I shall present the names and a brief description of the content. If you are interested in any of these ads, just e-mail me with "I am a tee-total moron" in the subject line and I'll forward them to you directly. By the way, the grammar has been copied directly from the mail, the asterisk simply replaces a word that could actually be interpreted as vulgar.

Here we go:

Hypnotizes R. Pears: Anime Girls with big blue eyes and msnoter (I THINK THIS IS MONSTER pr0n!)
Panickiest H. Polystyrene: Painted Beauties in pverert action with mnsoetr (YEA!, MORE MONSTER pr0n!)
Complacently O. Illustrator: Stupid Girl **** in mouth by wild **** (NO TYPOS!)
Robustly O. Finch: Barely Legal Drunk Local Girls ***** (AGAIN, NO TYPOS!)
Carouse R. Barmaid: Horrible Cwogirls Gteting their **** pumepd by animals (OH NO! NOT HORRIBLE COWGIRLS!)
Circularized P. Slipcover: Petrty Old **** **** (LOVE THE SENDER'S NAME)
Pulsar C. Handicap: Prtety Wrohe big cick movie (I GOT 'BIG' AND 'MOVIE', NOT SURE ON THE REST)
Aron I. Podiatrist: Shy Jnena Lewes **** on private video (FOOT DOCTOR pr0n)
Sykes O. Microprocessors: Old Aged Weomn sucking enmroously *** *** (ENMROOUSLY?)
Hydrangea O. Piled: Animated B*t*h fu*ekd by 3d mrstneo (THIS ONE ACTUALLY SAYS "Without an infant!")
Disappointments V. Coastline: Petite Drunk Coellge girls getting naked for the first time (AIN'T NOTHING NASTY ABOUT NEKKID COLLEGE GIRLS!)
Childbirth K. Helicon: Awful Sl*ts gteting fileld by wild *** (WHAT EXACTLY ARE THEY DOING?)
Robbery G. Rheostat: Incennot Avril Lavigne hacekd ptohos (HIS/HER NAME IS ROBBERY?)
Extraneous I. Lethargic: Cute Jsesica Simspon **** on private video (I WISH THEY WERE A LITTLE MORE LIKE THEIR LAST NAME)
Saran D. Hookey: ACME Beauties f**ekd by 3d guy (WILLEY COYOTE pr0n!)

Now, here's what I do with these. I simply forward one e-mail to the next. I have no idea what happens, but there is a little bit of satisfaction in returning the favor. Who knows, maybe Disappointments V. Coastline wants some pr0n from Childbirth K. Helicon. And wonder why Disappointments' parents named them that? Maybe 'cause they knew that little Dissy would grow up to be a pr0n spammer.

Anyway, these are just some of the pr0n mails, also I think that obviously someone thinks that my breasts aren't large enough, that my bidness ain't got enough bidness, and I need a damn college degree without ever attending class. Oh, and Dave, I really don't want your help with the ladies. Who in almighty, mortal Hell actually clicks these sites?

UPDATE: This post was submitted to the New Blog Carnival. These are all blogs that have been around less than three months. Check THIS out.

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13 comments:

Nzyme said...

Have you ever heard of SPAM protection?? Dos Doggies, you have TOO MUCH time on your hands!! Get yourself a yahoo e-mail account and enable the automatic deletion feature... Wait a minute! Maybe you WANT to receive such drivel! Maybe you ENJOY forwarding such nonsense to such nonsense! Well, scratch that idea, sir. I wouldn't want you to deny yourself such self-pleasure!!

Two Dogs said...

Yea, I get this out of my spam inbox, I really don't HAVE to read it, I just look at the names and descriptions. I find humor there. Who actually clicks this stuff? If no one did, the spammers would stop sending it.

soundboyz said...

But Two Dogs, You won't get targeted in the first place if you don't visit those type of sites!!!I have owned a yahoo account for a while , and never have I gotten one through that email.It is only when one visits those sites and/or download questionable material, the site gives your browser a cookie so that they can track your internet habits!!!

J&J'sMom said...

Not true...I don't look at that crap and it comes to me anyway...they always find a way ...just like the telemarketers. Hello, here via the Carnival today. I'm with you...give 'em back their own crap ;0) Same with junk mail...they don't have to pay for those postage free envelopes unless they get them back...send them back with another piece of junk and it costs them the $! Should slow up the junk mail too! Did for us ;0) Have a great day.

Erik Grow said...

Only problem with forwarding them on is that much of the time the info in the spam is forged, and you will simply be spamming some poor sap whose email was used to fill in the header!

Natsthename said...

I'm here via the Carnival today?

I get these types of emails in my "regular" account with my ISP. They are marked as SPAM, but still delivered to the inbox. Whatta pain! Who opens those things anyway? Or is this now just a game between spammers and those who try to block them?

Two Dogs said...

Another thing that can be done is to attache a very large file to the e-mail you send back. I like to send one that is about 47 mB. It only takes about three minutes for me to send it, but wonder what happens on the other end?

Harvey said...

Me, I like Mailwasher:

http://www.mailwasher.net/

because it lets you bounce the spam back to the sender, so it looks like your e-mail address isn't active.

Two Dogs said...

Man, that is a great idea.

Harvey said...

Me, I like Mailwasher:

http://www.mailwasher.net/

because it lets you bounce the spam back to the sender, so it looks like your e-mail address isn't active.

J&J'sMom said...

Not true...I don't look at that crap and it comes to me anyway...they always find a way ...just like the telemarketers. Hello, here via the Carnival today. I'm with you...give 'em back their own crap ;0) Same with junk mail...they don't have to pay for those postage free envelopes unless they get them back...send them back with another piece of junk and it costs them the $! Should slow up the junk mail too! Did for us ;0) Have a great day.

Natsthename said...

I'm here via the Carnival today?

I get these types of emails in my "regular" account with my ISP. They are marked as SPAM, but still delivered to the inbox. Whatta pain! Who opens those things anyway? Or is this now just a game between spammers and those who try to block them?

Two Dogs said...

Man, that is a great idea.

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