Wednesday, February 06, 2008

Vote Me Up a President - Technology Edition

Y'all are simply not engaging the Blackuary topic and for that you are being punished with more political talk. See what happens when you misbehave?

Anyhoo, Bean and I are currently building an empire that is starting with a construction detailing and architectural consulting business. When we kicked this off, the main thing that we decided was important was mobility because of her military service, you know, so I wouldn't be tied to one locale and could follow her ass around. That's where website design and reconizable branding comes in.

In the past month or so, I have been crash-coursing on css, javascript, and other platform and publishing stuff. No, I have no friggin' clue what the Hell I am doing, but I am filling my brain to capacity and actually enjoying learning how this interweb stuff works. In the meantime, I have also been consulting with a good friend of mine from childhood to design logos and trademark stuff. (His Crayola work is amazing!) Coupled with my design knowledge picked up in the architectural field, I have been rigidly transfixed in design work on all fronts. And I do not recognize this as being anywhere close to my forte. I am a redneck, but I have forced myself to focus on that sissy crap.

Furthermore, I have been researching traffic and have been using you folks as guinea pigs. Yes, I am trying to find out what sends people here and to another test blog that I created. By embedding crap into just about everything that I do, I get a good idea of what people are looking for and how to grab them with my sites. Regular readers have been conveniently excluded from this spying. Your visits are tainted, simply because you have already seen the vast expanse of my knowledge and cannot look away.

That's where are the stumbles, diggs, facebook, and reddit links originated. While doing this research, I have found that I cannot do without StumbleUpon anymore. The bar on my browser is getting worn out from my insistent clicking. That is how I found THIS link. I now have a new way to judge who these candidates are and their idiosyncracies.

We can't expect them to know everything, but they should be able to pick competent help. And this guy has compared the codes of each candidates sites. What this means to me is that somewhere along the line, each candidate must make the decisions on how to put their interweb's face forward and with the overwhelming importance of the web, it should not be taken lightly. Damn, you know that it is your life.

McCain took it lightly. I know that Senator McCain is like six hundred years old, but his grasp of the web is non-existent based on who put his site together and the design. His design company uses absolutely no web 2.0 stuff at all. None, he is still using the same technology as we used when we were running Windows 98 and playing Freecell. Not only does he use old, old, old technology, he has a site that is over eleven hundred lines of code. That is frigging huge! He doesn't get my vote at all because he doesn't take technology seriously at all. "Hey's let's go get in the buckboard and head to the square daince!" (Please pronounce "daince" the way that it is spelled.)

Huckabee's site doesn't even merit a conversation. Might as well be on geocities. Shit, it is awful. Hillbilly.

Barry's site looks smooth, but his programmer has allowed almost 150 errors in the code. The code is a little heavy, but not big enough to warrant 150 mistakes. That just shows me that they are sloppy and inexperienced, much like Barry. No vote for you!

The Lesbian Skank Train's site looks like something straight from a Kevin Trudeau special. I keep thinking that there would be music that played and you have no way to stop it. And those flashing gifs all over the damn place. It is skanky, and loud, just like her. I count eight different fonts on her front page. The code is pretty solid though. But, I still can't vote for her.

Ron Paul. Let's get serious, we simply cannot vote for Ron Paul, but on his site, with over six hundred lines of code, there is exactly one error. One. One. One. That is simply amazing, since I have seven on this blog with barely two hundred lines of code. He has one. Damn. (But, in my defense, my site is 16kB and his is 39kB. So, eat me, Ron Paul. You and your genius programmer.)

That leaves...Mitt Romney. Sonoffab.... I never wanted to vote for Mitt, but I have no choice. First, he is on an Apache server. He knows that the web is serious and he is concerned with stability and security. Furthermore, his site has just over fifty errors in a little over five hundred lines of code. That's pretty damn good. And it looks professional and is compact. Loads fast and is easy to read and navigate.

So, you vote for Mitt Romney, because he has the best website in my opinion. And that matters.

Please take the time to comment.

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