Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Disappointment Sets In (UPDATED!!)

A full forty-five friggin' minutes in and the free pony truck is STILL not at my house. How long could it POSSIBLY take to deliver three hundred million ponies?

We got gypped.

UPDATE 2 (UPDATE 1 below): Look, we could not have a bigger tool as president, but saying that he screwed up his oath is bullshit. Chief Justice John Roberts screwed up, it is very plain to see for even the most rabid Obama dissenter like me. Roberts flubbed the line by putting "faithfully" at the end. Obama responded correctly for the first time in his entire life. He allowed Roberts to correct himself. Don't be a douchebag like they are, please?



UPDATE: Seriously, NOT KIDDING, this is the most offensive thing that I have heard today: "Just another Black family moving into public housing." This is NOT helpful. AT ALL. Please do not make me change my opinion of this guy just to stand in solidarity against fucking MORONS.

DIRTY LANGUAGE BELOW! WARNING!

Excerpt from an actual chat thingy on Google Chat thingy:

C: Got free gas yet?

Me: THE FUCKING FREE PONY TRUCK IS NOT FUCKING HERE YET!!!!111!!!!! WHERE'S MY FUCKING FREE PONY!!!!!!111!!!!!!

C: joke is on us
gas aint free yet either
fuck

Me: I am holding my breath right fucking now until I get my fucking free pony. Fuckers.

Text Message from Sultan: My pony just got here and it is BEAUTIFUL!

Please take the time to comment.

8 comments:

christinajade said...

i don't have a damn pony yet either.

and i had to pay for gas today, too.

damnit

Denise said...

Thanks for this, TD. Frankly, you can have the pony I was supposed to get if I can have 7-8 goats in its place, but I don't know about the f'ing part. That's between you and the pony.

Two Dogs said...

Ewwww, Denise, that is nasty. The goats, I mean, not the pony sexing part.

nanc said...

the three biggest lies a politician tells:

1. trust me, i'm a gynoproctologist.

2. this is the honest to god truth.

3. the pony truck is on the way.

Two Dogs said...

nanc, I don't want my pony anymore, he be stanking.

Two Dogs said...

Ewwww, Denise, that is nasty. The goats, I mean, not the pony sexing part.

Two Dogs said...

nanc, I don't want my pony anymore, he be stanking.

Denise said...

Thanks for this, TD. Frankly, you can have the pony I was supposed to get if I can have 7-8 goats in its place, but I don't know about the f'ing part. That's between you and the pony.

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