Monday, March 23, 2009

Since We are ALL Leftards Now

As you are well aware, we are all Leftists now and nothing happens for any reason at all. So, obviously there is no explanation at all why the Dow has gained 302.42 at 1:26pm. It is just magic with no reason at all.

NAW MAN! It has nothing to do with all of the sudden our US currency is worth about half of what it was on Friday and the world is gobbling up stuff at bargain basement prices, huh? No, no reason at all, sir, ma'am, ambiguous other.

Folks, the collapse of our market is impending. Your time to bail is right this minute. The end is nigh. Yes, we might have a couple more days of climbing, but the TWO TRILLION bucks about to be released will be the final nail in the coffin.

Feh. It's only the rich people that are about to be clobbered.

The economy has gotten so bad, even the chosen footwear of this little blog author has been CRUSHED. Yes, Crocs are dead. (Half-staff flag raised by: Andy)

Crazy people have taken to the streets to oppose the Dear Leader and his altruistic policies. Four thousand NUTS braved the HARSH globally warmed climate of the Orlando area to HATE, promote GREED, and push RACISM.

Before you know it, no one shall be able to attend the free college of their choice. Everyone shall be forced to graduate with their 16th Century Poetry degree from Visalia Community College in Swampwater Creek, Tennessee. All because of hate and racism.

The People's State of Obamaland and the People's State of Chavezville shall enter into a pact of loathing and we shall always be at war with Chavezville, just as we have always been at war with Chavezville. You Ignoramus. Emmanuel Goldstein responds.

Not only that, but since we are friends with Chavezville and always have been, our enemy, the People's State of France, will change the names of their leaders to try to embarrass Big Brother. The PSoF has designs to conquer us, just as they always have had those designs. We have always been at war with them.

And since we have always been at war with the People's State of Achmideanajihadianastan, they have taken to attempting to assassinate Big Brother because of their fierce love of Capitalism and their hatred of their fellow man. They have no concept of Ingsoc and we shall always be at war with them. They have had this ideology since before the time of the reckoning of the past establishment of Big Brother. Greedy Capitalists!

Even when the past establishment of Big Brother developed an Ingsoc country in the forbidden lands of Africa, the leaders turned into the apex of altruism and love. All Hail Big Brother and his righteousness. Ingsoc has always been the way to enlightenment and plenty.

Why wouldn't the entire world fall at Big Brother's feet and capitulate and assimilate from the strength of his knowledge and words? Articulate, clean, altruistic. This is NOT a contradiction.

Big Brother is a jovial and caring entity. He finds the humor in all about him.

All those in the Ministry of Plenty have the best interests of all of us at heart
. They can do no wrong as long as altruism is at the heart of their actions.

Those at the Ministry of Peace have joined in the fight to promote the ideals of the human race. Their efforts are NOT FORGOTTEN. They are the epitome of love, peace, and selflessness.

And all of their words are PERFECT
. We should rejoice in their success and efforts.

Everything is better from their efforts. They have no failures at all.

Now, here's a song about a car.



Please take the time to comment.

9 comments:

One Salient Oversight said...

After the Dow rose a record amount I thought "I wonder if Two Dogs will be consistent and link the performance of the Dow to Obama?".

Of course not.

Two Dogs said...

I gave Obama complete credit, his dumping all the cash into the economy has killed the value of our currency and the market responded AS IT ALWAYS DOES.

Did you not read the first three paragraphs of this post? The reason is because of Barry and it is NOT GOOD.

One Salient Oversight said...

I read it. It's always a case of blaming Obama for the bad news and when it's good it's just a matter or reinterpreting the evidence.

Just be consistent. That's all I ask.

As for me, I hardly think Obama's spending is going to end in happiness and roses. The odds of a one term presidency are getting higher every day, as is the bankruptcy of the United States government and its people.

You might want to read this, in which I praise Newt Gingrich of all people.

Two Dogs said...

Well, you have to admit that before all he was doing was going through money on spending programs. It was a one sided thing that given time, with all other things left equal, the economy would eventually recover, years down the road.

Then he started trying to find new ways to tax us. While still call those new taxes something else. The insurance benefit income tax is one way, the military insurance was another.

Now, he is fucking around with money printing. He has created a perfect storm of economic stupidity. Evey decision has been bad, with no relief. With the "alleged" buyback of bonds and the increase of cash, we are frigging doomed.

China is about to make a call on our debt in the next month. Hide and watch.

christinajade said...

the market is like a freaking yard sale right now. let's face it, price ANYTHING at a nickel and it will sell.

and what will these people buying up all this yard sale garbage have at the end of the whole thing?

garbage.

and a great big HUGE margin call. yummy!~

Anonymous said...

You don't deserve to have Beck posted on your website.

Two Dogs said...

Uh, can you offer some rationale for that statement? Do you think that Beck doesn't want people to hear his music?

Two Dogs said...

Well, you have to admit that before all he was doing was going through money on spending programs. It was a one sided thing that given time, with all other things left equal, the economy would eventually recover, years down the road.

Then he started trying to find new ways to tax us. While still call those new taxes something else. The insurance benefit income tax is one way, the military insurance was another.

Now, he is fucking around with money printing. He has created a perfect storm of economic stupidity. Evey decision has been bad, with no relief. With the "alleged" buyback of bonds and the increase of cash, we are frigging doomed.

China is about to make a call on our debt in the next month. Hide and watch.

Anonymous said...

You don't deserve to have Beck posted on your website.

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