Monday, September 21, 2009

Verizon is my Bitch

After throwing a full frontal hissy fit (complete with mushroom tattoos for all the folks in the store, including customers) about my cell phone bill (900 friggin' bucks!!!) this past month, Verizon sent me an apology in the mail this weekend and offered me free phones all around.

Anyhoo, since I actually LIKE the MotoRazr V3 and abhor the humongous size of the newer phones, I am kinda wary of having to wear the fannypack that all of the iPhone users have to carry to tote a phone the size of the Motorola Brickphone from 1991. You see, MacApple has a tendency to lean "Progressive," which means they yearn for the technology of the Dark Ages.

Verizon has offered to give me one of five different models of phones, but the LGs I do not like. So, if anyone has one of these, tell me how you like it. Please understand that I am already biased toward anything Motorola.

Motorola Rival, Blackberry Storm, or Blackberry Curve are the three choices. Please do not tell me how awesome an iPhone is, because it is NOT. I have used them and their interface is as stupid as a MacAppletosh. Plus, I do not need to be able to store music on my phone. And I am NOT gay. And I do not care that everyone has one, it is a tool, NOT a status symbol to me.

This is why I refused to wear Izod shirts when they were cool, too. Of course, all of my tailored shirts are Izod now.

Fun Fact: I never owned a Members Only jacket, either.

Please take the time to comment.

30 comments:

stilettoGOP said...

I luuuurve my Curve! It rocks. Am on it now as a matter of fact.

I honestly can't say one bad thing about it. It's my 2nd one, and will upgrade soon to my 3rd. Won't own anything else. Battery time lasts FORever! And I'm on the net all flippin day. (Hi, boss!) The Curve multi account emailing is awesome. Wish it held more pics. But I'm a pic freak.

Yes, the iphone sucks ASS. Only reason to own one would be if you just can't live without the "shake the baby" app. (Whatever, ughh)

paul mitchell said...

stiletto, is there a camera on the Curve? I cannot take the time to research it, but the camera is kinda important to me. I do know that the Storm has a 3.2 megapixel camera, but it doesn't say anything about the Curve. Battery longevity is really important to me, thanks for that info.

And I shook my kid enough when he was a baby that I almost had to get rotator cuff surgery. I am done with that, I played the game in real life.

stilettoGOP said...

My current Curve has a 2 megapixel, with 5x zoom and a flash. (Boy the flash comes in handy.) My new 'upgrade' Curve, the 8900 (At&t), will have a 3.2, and 2x zoom, but will have video capability. I've found the camera quality to be marginal to good. Is just a convenience goodie, as my BB stays hooked to my bra strap at all times. You could always do that in lieu of the fanny pack, because THAT would be gay.

paul mitchell said...

Thanks for offering to carry my phone around attached to your bra-strap, stiletto. Arm candy is all that is missing from my posse. Do you mean that different companies offer different models of the Curve? Dang, that is weird. But the camera specs are certainly better than the MotoRazr V3, so that is good. The Curve is looking good, now. But, it does seem kinda bulky.

stilettoGOP said...

I'm not fer positive on the model thing, thought they run a little different from carrier to carrier, but not sure.

Seeing as I DO have another available shoulder strap to tote your phone, I guess I could do it for a small fee. That's all I need, my chest to have more 'Curves'! HA!! I crack me up.

Skunkfeathers said...

I am a technosaurus when it comes to this crap. Still don't have a cell phone. Still don't want one.

Same with logoed shirts, Izod or otherwise.

I will cling to the 20th Century for as long as I can get away widdit ;)

paul mitchell said...

Thanks for that image stiletto. But, I am not laughing, I have a 1000 mile stare on my face like a lion eye-balling a wounded gazelle.

(For those of you that do not know, stiletto is not only a strikingly intelligent, brutally sarcastic, and humorous lady, but she is stark-raving beautiful. And I have very high standards, too. Just saying.)

classicaliberal said...

If you're bitching about the size of the MacApple iPhone then you're going to loathe the blackberries. Besides the fact that the operating software was designed by NASA during the 1840's. Sure, you'll be able to snap pictures of drunk girls at your local wattering whole with the snazzy camera and you'll be able to send and receive emails, but all of this is at the cost of carrying around a lead brick in your pocket or on your belt. Had a blackberry curve and a blackberry pearl, both made me want to chew on broken glass. If you have another option, go with it.

stilettoGOP said...

Aww shucks. But word is stiletto likes (some) Nickelback. So might as well have the sex appeal of a stapler. ;)

classicaliberal said...

At the risk of being ridiculed, mocked and any other behavior that I am subjected to daily on this blog, might I suggest the Motorola enV2 or enV3. Fairly compact, lightish, full qwerty keyboard, camera, etc. An enV2 is going to be inexpensive to activate as well. I use an enV2 as my work cell, and although thicker than I prefer, it is light weight and easy to use.

paul mitchell said...

At the risk of sounding completely stupid, Motorola spells their name on the enV "LG." Is LG actually made by Motorola? Because the one LG phone I had made me want to punt bunnies.

classicaliberal said...

Motorola branding FAIL!

Motorola's software interface is modeled after LG or the other way around. If you liked your Razr, then you should be able to make the jump to the Motorola enV easily.

paul mitchell said...

The LG enV is one of the choices I have, but I don't want an LG. in case you were unaware, LG stands for Lotsa Gay.

Enjoy your phone, CL.

(Dead) Tommy5 said...

Just pick a damn phone, use it for a week and return it for another phone. Keep doing this until you find a stupid phone you like. Dang.

paul mitchell said...

(D)T5, was the only reason you bought the LG Chocolate because it came with a free purse and a lifetime supply of "Buff Studs in Uniforms" magazine?

Andy said...

So, when did every commenter on this blog learn "Greek?"

I'm with Skunks...I ain't got one, and hopes I never does. But The Mrs. does.

She "texted" one of the boys yesterday, and I was impressed.

Hey Paul, pitchin' a shoe at a store can come in awfully handy sometimes. When Pam's Daddy was all hopped up on medicine while he was dying with bone marrow cancer (and basically batshit crazy), we made the fatal error of taking him to Albertson's to get the "buy one, get one free" orange juice special.

3 hours later we walked out, having completely destroyed commerce for the store, going through 3 supervisors, and finally saving the 8 cents tax on the free gallon of orange juice that he said he would "die before he paid!"

Jill said...

Me and Tom got LGs, easy to use and fits in pocket when fishing, Of course u should never take tech advice from swampbillies ;)

paul mitchell said...

Andy, that is awesome. Eight cents.

Jill, I shall always take the swampbilly advice when it comes to fishing, drinking, and eating. Y'all know the important stuff.

classicaliberal said...

Just for the record, 'F*ck the Motorola Blackberry!'

You're welcome

paul mitchell said...

CL, you have issues with this insulting stuff, you are supposed to insult your buddies, not appliances or tools.

Well, except for the ibegayphone.

classicaliberal said...

'Wah! I can't figure out how to work an LG cell phone. It scares me cause it was programed by a 14 year old Japanese girl.'
'I'm the bestest blogger in Mississippi, ever! Mommy says so!'
'I paid too much to attend crappy Mississippi State and I can't get over it. I am defined by this single event.'
'The iPhone sucks! People young enough to know, told me so.'
'Warren Harding is my favorite President! I voted form him when we finally got voting rights in 1920!'

paul mitchell said...

CL, we shall score this one after I tell you that the reason I do not like the LGs is that Bean had one that was a total hunk of shit. Good Lord, that was the worst phone in history. Including Alexander Graham Bell's. But, I fear nothing.

I call my mother "Mr. Belvedere." Minus one.

Six dollars is too much to pay for a doctorate at We Suck. Minus two.

The iPhone is gay, plus one.

Warren Harding was a suck shit president. You get another free pick on that. But, the age barb was well thought out and delivered. With a good pick on the president, there is a chance to pick up two points, here.

Cumulative score, MINUS ONE. Clock is running on the president repick.

classicaliberal said...

Warren Harding was the first President for which women could cast a vote. Thus, I knew he was your favorite, having been the first you could 'legally' vote for.

If I must pick a second President, I'll go with my personal favorite, William Henry Harrison for obvious reasons. As we've discussed, however, your second favorite President would be Woodrow Wilson. With his strong leadership on the progressive income tax, support for labor unions, siezing control of railroads and passing women's sufferage, there is no doubt why you're a Wilson fan. Strangely, Wilson was the United States first openly gay President, having married this guy.

The Mayor said...

I have the BB Bold, which rocks. From what i hear though, the BB Curve is weak, girlie-like, and the Storm sounds pretty gay. If anyone here has the storm, my apology...in the sense that i apologize that you have a gay sounding cell phone.

The Mayor said...

I heard Obama has the Storm.

Enough said.

paul mitchell said...

It doesn't get much gayer than Obama, Mayor. Liberace said so.

paul mitchell said...

It doesn't get much gayer than Obama, Mayor. Liberace said so.

classicaliberal said...

At the risk of being ridiculed, mocked and any other behavior that I am subjected to daily on this blog, might I suggest the Motorola enV2 or enV3. Fairly compact, lightish, full qwerty keyboard, camera, etc. An enV2 is going to be inexpensive to activate as well. I use an enV2 as my work cell, and although thicker than I prefer, it is light weight and easy to use.

paul mitchell said...

Thanks for that image stiletto. But, I am not laughing, I have a 1000 mile stare on my face like a lion eye-balling a wounded gazelle.

(For those of you that do not know, stiletto is not only a strikingly intelligent, brutally sarcastic, and humorous lady, but she is stark-raving beautiful. And I have very high standards, too. Just saying.)

The Mayor said...

I heard Obama has the Storm.

Enough said.

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