Monday, June 28, 2010

Two Dogs Questions Supreme Nominee, Elena Kagan

Two Dogs: First let me apologize for forcing you to wear that twelve pack box over your head...um...Mr? Mizz? Kagan? I had to drink it first to stomach questioning someone with your physical...um...attributes. I just have a coupla' three questions.

Number one, do you think that it is okay to kill a ten year old child and where do you find that in The Constitution? If not, at what age is it okay to kill children because you have said on numerous occasions that it was legal?

Kagan: Um...

Two Dogs: Please shut up while I am asking my questions, I am going to ask them and get the Hell outta here and read your idiotic answers on the transcript. It is inhumane to make us sit in the room with you. If you are through interrupting, may I continue?

Kagan: Wh....

Two Dogs: Did I not just tell you to shut up? Can you not follow directions at all?

Kagan: Sir,...

Two Dogs: Good Lord, Ugly Betty, please zip the cakehole.

Kagan:.....

Two Dogs: Thank you for shutting your yapper.

Now, number two, does the Constitution say that our right to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed? And when it says that, does that mean that people have the right to keep and bear arms or were the Framers of the Constitution just bullshitting us?

Number three, is it possible that the electorate of the United States could elect someone as stupid as Barry Obama in the future? Would you support a Constitutional amendment that demands our president not be a retarded imbecile like Obama plainly is? And how long do you think that it shall be before he winds up in jail?

Will someone gimme a holler when the transcript is available? Just so you know, I vote to NOT confirm, this person is so under-qualified to be a fry cook at McDonald's, it is overwhelming.

Is it September YET?

Please take the time to comment.

17 comments:

Boogie said...

Watched the opening statements from Leahy (Dumbass-VT) and Sessions for her/its/whatever confirmation hearings while I was eating lunch. The look of discomfort on Kagan's face while Sessions was speaking was almost enough to make me not want my fried chicken.

Almost.

paul mitchell said...

Kagan is certainly NOT HOT. If we just have to appoint stupid women, why not pick Halle Berry or Salma Hayek? They are pretty dumb, too, but easy enough on the eyes to eat fried chicken with.

stilettoGOP said...

Holy GOD the last two posts make me want to buy more guns.

Barry the Barbarian said...

Because you were not there to question Kagan, I changed the channel and watched Bonanza instead. The only way I could be in the same room as her is if she was fitted with one of those electric training collars that you put on dogs.

paul mitchell said...

stiletto, ammo up, you are gonna need it.

Barry, that would have to be one big dog collar. I am trying to come up with who she reminds me of, too. Since she doesn't wear glasses, it is not Roger Ebert from twenty years ago.

Boogie said...

She looks like Kevin James from King of Queens.

paul mitchell said...

I thought that at first, too. But, Kevin is good looking for a chunky dude. Kagan, on the other hand, is NOT good looking for a chunky dude.

Basil said...

I don't know who likes the ugly fat chicks more: Clinton or Obama.

Plus, they all suck. In one way or another.

Andy said...

Two Dogs, we've been asking "Is it September yet?" for a while now.

I'm starting to ask, "Is it November yet?"


And Basil...nyuk!

paul mitchell said...

Basil, and they SLEEP with them, too! Guh-ross.

Andy, once footbaw season starts, I shall have something other than the Obama Failboat to watch. It shall be a welcome change, too.

Staci said...

That's damned funny.

Andy said...

That musta been funny.

You done got Staci to cussin'...

Skunkfeathers said...

Only Congressobots could sit in the same room with the buttuglybot Kagan, and not have a teleprompter melt.

Anonymous said...

Is she a virgin? you think?

(... I know, I know, that's troll talk).

Anonymous said...

Is she a virgin? you think?

(... I know, I know, that's troll talk).

there, I've owned up to it. now kill me.

marc in calgary

Anonymous said...

Is she a virgin? you think?

(... I know, I know, that's troll talk).

there, I've owned up to it. now kill me.

marc in calgary

Staci said...

That's damned funny.

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