I Can Read! A Book(s) Review

I have a special treat for my reader because I have actually enjoyed a three hour long nap this afternoon and feel awesomatic tonight. I think that I will write a review on the last two books that I have read, yeah! On to the SHOW!

Richard Wright-Black Boy. Oh boy, if ever there is a misnamed tome floating around, this would be the damn one. Dick should have called this book "My Road to Becoming the Biggest Asshole Ever in the History of the Earth and Why I Love, Love, Love Communism!"

Also, I searched every single site on the Internet (there are seventeen as far as you know) for a good image of the actual cover of the book that I read, THAT would show the congruence of these two book reviews, but, alas, there was none worth posting on the entire damn interwebs that fulfilled the high standards of this blog.

Anyhoo, HERE is the Wikipedia page for Dick. It seems that Dick was born in G-d's country, right here in damn Mississippi, which ties this book to today's other one as well. A native of little Roxie, MS, Dick was born into a share-cropper home and grew up po'. And he wrote about it in this damn book. Damn, Dick, you want me to go get your shawl and purse outta the damn truck? What a whining little cry-baby, this guy is. Ooooooo, Dick, you gonna get in trouble for being Black! Well, just kiss my ass from now on! (Get it, gnut?)

This story was obviously written by someone that had absolutely no damn education or common sense at all, but still managed to think that he was better than everyone else. No, he really had no education and the Communists thought that he was an intellectual and kept on his case about it. That gives you another reason to hate Communists because they are so stupid as to think that Richard Wright was an intellectual. The funny thing is that every single reference that he makes to Communism proves that he was a fool. He makes the statement on numerous occasions throughout the course of this mind-numbing drivel that he knows that Communism is the surefire bet on the governmental type lottery. And he was still pushing that agenda when he died in Europe in 1960, even after every single human in the world knew that it was an utter failure. What a dumbass!

So, he bitches and moans throughout the whole book about how bad it was growing up a poor, Black sharecropper's son and then moves to Chicago and joins the dumbest movement ever. Damn, this book is a treatise on how to completely fail at life and become a drain on society in general. And oddly enough, he bitches about the treatment of the Black man by the White man and then goes off and marries a White woman. Hinky, but she WAS an avowed Communist, and this proves that the references to his being Black are secondary to being Communist.

The thing that keeps tripping me out is that "Mississippi Believe It!" still puts him on the state posters for "great" writers, when he hated everything about our great state and everything about our great country. Dick, you suck and I hope that Communists don't even go to Hell for their crimes, I hope there is no afterlife for y'all. Okay, that was harsh.

Opinion: Read this damn book, so you never have to have a conversation with someone that thinks that Richard Wright is a great American and Mississippi writer. He denounced his country and his state. He was French.

Anne Moody-Coming of Age in Mississippi. Damn, I wish that y'all could see the cover of the Dick-Book I read, it is almost exactly like this one. But, that is where the similarities end, well not really. Here is yet another book, by yet another Black writer, that attempts to lump every Black person together and assumes that their experiences are the same because of the color of their skin. Damn, I hate that, but I did like this book. Let me tell you why.

This book starts out with another poor Black person growing up in rural Mississippi and the memories of the era are familiar to me. The experiences that Essie Mae Moody (her real name) had were some of the same that I had growing up as a "white" Catholic in rural Mississippi. Yeah, there was damn bigotry, but it made me better, not worse. These experiences filled the voids in my life, they did not exacerbate them. Remember, I am not now, nor have I ever been, Black. I do not know what that is like, but I do know that as the human race, we pretty much get the same things from the same situations. We can't turn away from the train wrecks, but still we can't stand them either.

For the sake of brevity, I shall refer to Ms. Moody as "EM", that's Essie Mae in case you fell asleep during the last paragraph. HERE's her Wikipedia page. Remember, wiki is bad about information gathering. Her parents were Diddly and Toosweet Moody, not Fred and Elmira. Those are probably just nicknames, but EM's book never refers to them as Fred and Elmira, ever.

Just like Dick, EM had issues as a child. She rarely got along with anyone. My thoughts are that she was searching for a way from the po' side of the tracks and got pissed at everyone that couldn't help her. Instead of using her anger to lift herself up from her bootstraps, she used that anger to lash out at everyone around her. She was a spoiled brat even though she didn't have a pot to piss in. And she hated whitey. That was what was odd to me. When she didn't have anything, she worked as domestic help for WHITE folks that really couldn't afford to pay her and STILL she was bitter, same as Dick. Well, enough about being poor in Mississippi except for this; it really didn't have anything to do with race. It had to do with economics, in my opinion. I really was never hungry, but still I understand, being the offspring of a single mother that rarely got financial help from a very wealthy ex-husband.

My interest lies with her road to a career. She graduated from Tougaloo College, a hotbed of socialism and subversive stuff going on back in the Sixties. Tougaloo is still a hotbed for socialism and subversive activity, but so is every other private college in the Nation. She did however participate in the Woolworths sit-in in Jackson and got her ass kicked. I respect that a whole damn bunch. She did something instead of just whining like the Dickster.

After college, she continued to be an activist and went to work for CORE in Canton, Mississippi during the most volatile times in our state's history. Death threats were not uncommon and she lived in complete fear most of the time, but she was standing up for the right things. Granted, she hated white people, too, but she still moved forward. Oh well, you can't have everything, where the Hell would you put it? Oh, CORE is the Congress for Racial Equality, in case you are white and didn't know that.

After writing all this inflammatory stuff for four hundred twenty pages, she wraps the book up with six pages of nothing but crap. It's more of that touchy-feely stuff that all of the far, far, far leftwing folks spew out. "Let's hop in the Rambler and move to Eutopia" type garbage.

Opinion: Good damn book. Held my interest for the entire read. Read it and know what it is like to date an angry, Black woman. Well, I think that she is actually a lesbian, so you couldn't date her, but that doesn't matter 'cause the lesbians are mad all the time too. Damn mad lesbians.

Final parting thoughts: Why is it when someone grows up poor, and in these cases, Black, do they always look to organizations or government to solve their problems? Why can those same people not turn to the tenets that successful people have turned? You know, when I think about something that I want to accomplish, I look to people that have accomplished that exact same thing in their own lives, I certainly don't turn to people that cannot work for anyone other than some non-profit or even worse, the government. And further and worser, countries that are poor and oppressed ALWAYS try to turn to some type of dictatorial government that has proven to further the same things that caused revolution in the first place.

A wise man once said "Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it." Yeah, George Santayana was talking about Liberals and Radicals, namely Getrude Stein, who oddly enough was friends with Dick and was also an angry lesbian. Full circle, dude.

Lawdog Contributes Yet Again!

Run-on Sentence Because That's How I Talk: After biting Bean's head off earlier, I have been swamped with work and my back is killing me because I am laying on my bed drawing an entire damn apartment complex on my spiffy new laptop, the laptop that Bean bought for me to replace the 2001 Agent Super-Spy Micron Transport GX-Plus, when out of the damn blue, Lawdog, oh he of the deployed son and a damn minister too, sends me a link to a damn video to look at and a damn good one, too, that makes me not want to bite Bean's head off, except for every once in a while or so.

Hey, kick me in the arrow and quiver, Lawdog. I need it sometimes.

And Bean, you know that I am a pendejo. Sorry.

Here We Go Again!

It's time for the BCS again! Yay! If there is a more inept bunch, they have to be government employees. (Not the military, Bean.)

Here's the Rankings and a little commentary.

1. Ohio State-Remember last year? Are you stupid, BCS? You are? Okay, then.
2. Boston College-Oh, okay.
3. LSU-Two lines too low, just saying.
4. Arizona State-I can't wait until next weekend.
5. Oregon-See above comment.
6. Oklahoma-If these guys don't win out, I will be shocked.
7. West Virginia-Quality wins over ranked teams, hahahahahaha.
8. Kansas-Their only decent game is against Missouri, what does that tell you?
9. Missouri-Got destroyed by Oklahoma. The score was 41-31, but Oklahoma quit and left with seven minutes left in the second quarter.
10. Georgia-A 6-2 SEC team is ranked higher than Hawaii who is undefeated.
11. Virginia Tech-If they don't win out, there is something dreadfully wrong.
12. Michigan-You have simply got to be kidding me. They lost to Appalachian State. That's crazy.
13. Connecticut-Don't take this the wrong way, but they don't deserve to be in the top 100.
14. Hawaii-They do not play any ranked teams at all, unless you count Boise State, and you shouldn't.
15. Texas-This is a bad team, folks.
16. Auburn-How is 6-3 Auburn ranked above 6-2 Alabama? That's hinky.
17. Alabama-See note above.
18. South Florida-For the love of Pete! Will someone dig their head outta their ass! This team is terrible.
19. USC-Uh, will these folks just go away? Please?
20. Florida-How is Florida still here?
21. Wisconsin-They lost to Penn State. Penn State! Damn, the Big Eleven sucks, why can't they just stop playing football?
22. Boise State-Beat Nevada 69-67 in a hella defensive matchup a coupla weeks ago and BLUE GRASS!
23. Virginia-Coming off a win, I mean LOSS to 3-5 NC State! Geez.
24. Wake Forest-The Fighting Baptists! Yeah, that's where Arnold Palmer went to school. Come up with another superstar from Wake. Basketball doesn't count, folks.
25. Clemson-For some odd reason, I like Clemson, go figger.

This is just like watching a train wreck. You want to look away, but damn it is impossible. On a side note, on ESPN tonight, a caller made the comment that "So and so looked as nervous as Michael Vick in a Pet Smart." They should shut that station down.

Hey, Boss! The Polls! The Polls!

It took less than twelve hours for me to see if I am a genius or not. Understand that either way that the polls go, I am right. On to the show....

1. Ohio State, got it.
2. Boston College, got it.
3. LSU, got it.
4. Arizona State, damn moved up four slots by sitting home. I had Oklahoma. PAC-10, you know, USC has to be in the title game.
5. Oregon, damn moved up five by beating an unranked nobody. I had Arizona State. And they leapfrogged Oklahoma? Oh, that's right, we have to get USC in the title game.
6. Oklahoma, damn they fell by winning against Iowa State. I had West Virginia. See prior USC comments.
7. West Virginia, damn moved up two by beating super-unranked We Suck, a fifth place SEC West team. State is five out of six in the SEC West, y'all. I had South Florida.
8. Virginia Tech, damn moved up three slots by staying home. I had the Oregon Ducks.
9. Kansas, damn moved up four slots by beating an unranked nobody. I had Kentucky, but I said they couldn't fall completely out because that would make the BCS look stupid. Need I say more? Because Kentucky sure as Hell fell out of the Top Ten.
10. South Florida, damn, but I told you they wouldn't fall out of the Top Ten! I had Virginia Tech.

Florida is number eleven and USC is number twelve. And just so you know, Cal, who was on the verge of becoming the number one team in the nation just two short weeks ago, has dropped to number twenty-one, because they suck. That means that they play in the PAC-10 for those of you who don't know college football.

So, I had nine of the Top Ten, but only three in the same place. Let's check the AP, the Idiot Today, and the Fan Polls. Please notice that South Florida is nowhere to be found here.
AP: Ohio State, BC, LSU, Oklahoma, Oregon, West Virginia, Arizona State, Virginia Tech, USC, Florida (not South Florida!).
Idiot Today: Ohio State, BC, LSU, Oklahoma, Oregon, West Virginia, Arizona State, USC, Virginia Tech, Kansas.
Finally the Fan Poll: Ohio State, LSU, BC, Oklahoma, Oregon, Arizona State, West Virginia, Florida, USC, Viginia Tech.

I am really dumbfounded that all the other polls have USC and the BCS doesn't. If USC loses another game, it's going to be damn near impossible for them to win the National Championship this year and we all know what that means, huh?

I wish that I could make a graphic to display exactly where all the these polls fall, but my Agent Super-Spy Micron Transport GX-Plus blew a head gasket today. Man, that computer was only six and a half years old. I am currently blogging from Bean's old Gateway laptop that has a whopping 128 megs of RAM. It is swuuuft, I tell you, but at least it works.

As aside, do y'all think that there are too many sports posts here? If you (singular) do, then make your own blog and I will read it.

Two Dogs BCS Rankings Week Two

If you recall, we talked a little about how B-A-D the BCS is and how stupid sportswriters are last week. Today, I am going to try to channel stupidity to rank the BCS one day before it comes out. Trust me, I am NOT going to be close to the rankings because I cannot bend my neck far enough to get my head up my ass. I think that I pulled a rib muscle trying though because I go all out for my one blog reader.

Here we go, last week's rankings and weekend's outcomes:
1. Ohio State beat Michigan State 24-17
2. South Florida lost to Rutgers 30-27
3. Boston College-Bye
4. LSU beat 17. Auburn 30-24
5. Oklahoma beat Iowa State 17-7
6. South Carolina lost to Vandy 17-6
7. Kentucky lost to 15. Florida 45-37
8. Arizona State-Bye
9. West Virginia beat We Suck 38-13
10. Oregon beat Washington 55-34
11. Virginia Tech-Bye
12. California lost to UCLA 30-21
13. Kansas beat Colorado 19-14
14. USC beat The Catholics 38-0
15. Florida beat 6. Kentucky 45-37
16. Missouri beat 24.Texas Tech 41-10
17. Auburn lost to 4. LSU 30-24
18. Hawaii-Bye
19. Virginia beat Maryland 18-17
20. Georgia-Bye
21. Tennessee lost to Alabama 41-17
22. Texas beat Baylor 31-10
23. Cincinnati lost to Pitt 24-17
24. Texas Tech lost to 16. Missouri 41-10
25. Michigan beat Illinois 27-17

Now, we see from the list above that of the twenty teams that played, twelve won their games. And we had five teams with a bye. I can’t actually say that teams should move up if they don’t play, but well, this IS the BCS. Now, since I don’t watch every single college football game, although I HAVE tried, I shall only pick the Top Ten. Gimme a break, you try this, it ain’t easy.

The TWO DOGS Second Week BCS Shot-In-The-Dark
1. Ohio State, even though they barely beat Michigan State because they looked like they were trying to catch a greased pig, we simply HAVE to fluff them because that's what we do.
2. Boston College, even though they didn't play, they are a bunch of white guys that are bad at football and so are we.
3. LSU, since we have to give them rednecks one damn poll spot, well maybe two.
4. Oklahoma, since we have to fluff the Big-12, too.
5. Arizona State, PAC-10 and a BYE? Around the world baby! The only reason they don't get the number one spot is because of all the comments above, you know.
6. West Virginia, because we love, love, love the Klan and Robert Byrd.
7. South Florida, because they only lost to last year's darling.
8. Oregon, yessssss, PAC-10 and we can get USC up in the top five with a win over Oregon next week. We might even get them high enough to be in the Championship game again!
9. Kentucky, because they can't fall completely out with a loss to a Top-25 team, that would make us look stupid.
10. Virginia Tech, uh, because South Carolina has to fall a long way or we still have three SEC teams in the Top-Ten.

I think that this looks pretty damn good for a first timer, don't you? We will know tomorrow how good I did, though. I have to get a job working for the four letter.

Sorry, I've Been Kinda Busy

Well, we finally have our first BCS Poll released and it's a doozy. As I thought, Ohio State has fallen up the stairs into the top slot with their pummeling of 112th ranked Kent State University and with LSU's triple overtime loss to the Number 7 Ranked Kentucky Wildcats. Now the fun part of the rankings.

Every single computer poll has South Florida ranked number one, while none of the other sources ranks them higher than number two. Why? It's because of the sportwriters needed the fluffing work on that DAMN Big 10 schools nobbin. See, computers don't have mouths, they simply take the data that is entered, do a few calculations, and then spew out the top teams. Kinda simple when it's based on data instead of having to choose just whose pole you want to smoke. I guess that sportswriters think that the SEC's johnsons are dirty or something.

Do I think that South Florida should be Numero Uno? Why Hell no. What's going to happen is that we are going to wind up with a bunch of one loss teams and Ohio State is going to be undefeated. Then Ohio State is going to get shellacked again this year by an SEC team, just like last year when Florida was number two and every single sportscaster in the nation gave them absolutely no chance to beat Ohio State. We all know how that turned out, hmmmmmm? And oddly enough, the Vegas line was nine points and it was Florida plus 9. Seems they know something that ESPN doesn't. I bet that the bookies cleaned up because most people get their sports information from, you guessed it, ESPN.

Even more fun was had by all when the 2006 Heisman Trophy was awarded to none other than Troy Smith, the quarterback for Ohio State that looked like a third string junior high quarterback when facing the Gates. Yea, I don't like the Gates that much, having had many traumatic experiences in the Swamp as a child watching the Bulldogs get the living shit beat out of them there.

Oh yea, Troy Smith, the Heisman Trophy winner, was drafted into the NFL by the Baltimore Ravens as the 174th pick of the draft. Yea, the Heisman Trophy winner from Ohio State was the damn last pick of the fourth round. Do you know what that means? It means that when the Ravens got down to the last pick of the fourth round, they got a Heisman Trophy winner for the league minimum. That means that the best player, allegedly, in college football sucked so bad that no one wanted him.

Now, the rest of the poll. Of the top twenty-five teams, only seven are SEC schools. Seven of twelve SEC schools are in the top twenty-five. That is simply amazing. Do understand that it is not going to end up that way because the SEC schedule is in full swing and the SEC schools are playing other SEC schools, so someone has to lose.

So, at the end of the year, when only three SEC schools are ranked, ESPN will take that as the SEC just isn't any good and we will wind up next year, yet again with USC and Ohio State near the top of the pre-season polls with maybe LSU near the top as well. And there will be folks screaming yet again for a playoff system.

Well, my friends, I am here to tell you that we already have one and the Championship game is played every year in Atlanta. Just try to get tickets for that one and if you luck out and actually do, you will have seen the number one and number two college teams in the nation play each other.

A Two Dogs PSA

That's Public Service Announcement in case you went to Pearl High School or actually attended MSU.

My alma mater sent me yet another e-mail soliciting funds to buy some useless crap for some useless college (I think that it was gender studies.) on that useless campus and I thought that I would forward the link that was attached to the e-mail. I can picture guys filming hovering coke bottles where you can actually see the fishing line. I almost peed in my pants.

Go HERE. Do not drink! I just kept thinking about Orwell's 1984, because that's the extent of the technology used to create this site.

Mississippi State University is planning for the future by making quite possibly the worst Flash site ever in the history of the world. My dog Roger actually sat down one time and wrote a paper totally trashing Flash, but she's like that and she's also a very good programmer. How do you think that this blog looks so awesome? Canine power, baby. In case you did not know this, the Interwebs has moved beyond sites that are built around Flash, which is about as non-interactive as you can get. Personally, I think that HTML is lightyears ahead of anything produced by Adobe, but what the Hell do I know, except that this Flash site takes about three damn minutes to load. I also liked to click on the pages and watch nothing happen. That is always good for your "user-friendly" site, you know.

UPDATE: Instead of hearing the actual music, I like to imagine the background is "Puff the Magic Dragon." I promise that you can hear it. Pinky swear.

Here's the Rankings

Okay, the Big-10 (Ours go to 11!) fluffers from the USA Today are out in full force. Come on, Ohio State gets two (2) number one votes? The Buckeyes are undefeated so far and have a 6-0 record. Let's look at their monstrosity of a schedule so far, 'mmmm K?

Youngstown State Penguins 4-2, damn, they beat Stony Brook and Lock Haven, why are they not ranked? Akron Zips 3-3, with their quality win against Army, how can they not be top ten? Washington Huskies 2-3, PAC-10, need we say more? Northwestern Wildcats 3-3, they lost to Duke. Duke! Minnesota Golden Gophers 1-5, geez, the Golden Gophers. Who the Hell would play there? Purdue Boilermakers 5-1, they have beaten Toledo, Eastern Illinois, Central Michigan, Minnesota, and the Catholics, who are 1-5, by the way.

Can someone please point out just how in Hell the Buckeyes are even regarded as D-IA football with this schedule? Let's see where it goes from here.

Kent State, Michigan State, Penn State, Wisconsin (19), Illinois (18), and Michigan. In my opinion, with every win for the rest of the year, where Ohio State wins by less than 100 points, they should drop a minimum of ten slots on the rankings.

Let's gawk at the train wreck that is the rest of the ranking stupidity, shall we? Cal, please, surely you are joking. PAC-10. Boston College, please go look at their monster schedule. South Florida, the new Rutgers, wait to see what gianormous bowl these losers attend and watch someone like San Jose State blow them out, 70-0. Oklahoma, okay, I'll give you that, but damn I hate those guys. I gotta stop, this is making me sick.

Captain Obvious Loves College Football!

Okay, let's get the most obvious stuff out of the way first. The PAC-10 sucks, it's always sucked and it WILL always suck. The only reason that USC ever gets ranked is because they play in the PAC-10, they do not play anyone that is worth a flaming crap, and the sportswriters that vote for them are on the west coast and don't want to piss off the guys that supply their weed. Remember, sportwriters and sportscasters are generally really, really stupid people. As far as an intelligence ranking goes, about the only professions that these jock-heads rank above in intelligence are public school teachers or federal politicians. Does that explain exactly how stupid they are? (Do understand that there are some good public school teachers and politicians, but they are in the small, small minority, so please, Einstein, hold those hate mails. I do, for the most part, enjoy getting the hate mail, but you guys that send stuff about how smart teachers are, just really need to go back to work at the Starbucks and get me a latte.)

Just know this: When I saw the headline on the frontpage of the Four-Letter Networks webpage, I thought that they were shutting down ESPN. "Stop The Insanity", indeed. Oh well, you can't always get what you want. And do I really want them to shut down? No, I just wish that they would broadcast on mute, because there exist in this country, people that do not know that the people on ESPN have no clue about sports at all and those same people actually vote. Footnote: Jim Rome, damn what a moron, but still, I listen to his show daily.

On to the show. Yesterday, the daunted USC Trojans were upset by the Cardinal of Stanford. Yes, Stanford is named after a color, not a bird. I think that they actually purchased the name from a WNBA team that failed before it even got off the ground, but that is neither here nor there. Could you actually come up with a more suiting name for them? I'm thinking "The Panty-Wearing Booty-Boys" but I think that name is already taken by John Edwards and it's my pet name for USC.

As an aside, I could go into the comparisions between the Big-12 and the SEC, but is there really any reason to do that? Even Texas and OU fans know better than that.

Let's take a gander at the PAC-10 schools and you tell me who Mississippi State should add to their schedule for homecoming. Just looking at the teams, it would be a safe bet to add any of them.

Arizona State Sun Devils
UCLA Bruins
California Golden Bears
USC Trojans
Oregon Ducks
Oregon Sate Beavers
Arizona Wildcats
Stanford Cardinal
Washington Huskies
Washington State Cougars

Not one of these jumps out at me to be a powerhouse, oh except for those damn Sun Devils simply because of their quality win over Colorado who plays in the Big-12. I almost threw up laughing just then. The Big-12, ha.

Okay, let's get to the gist of this article, I think that I have bashed all those that I had in mind. Now, let's talk football, conferences, and National Championships.

The Southeastern Conference is by far the best conference in the nation, always has been, always will be. There have six, count 'em, six different SEC Champions in the last ten years. There are twelve teams in the Conference since 1992, before there were ten. Of the twelve, three have never won the championship, they are South Carolina, Arkansas, and Vanderbilt. Vanderbilt did win National Championships quite a few times before the SEC was formed, but they were playing against teams like Harvard, Michigan, USC, and Pennsylvania, so it doesn't really count to anyone that knows sports. South Carolina and Arkansas have only been in the conference since 1992. Also, my alma mater last won it in 1941, but then again, Mississippi State s-u-c-k-s. Get upset, y'all, but it's true.

Okay, in all sports, the SEC only won eight National Championships LAST YEAR, including football, men's and women's basketball, men's and women's swimming and diving, gymnastics, men's tennis, and bowling. Hey! Vanderbilt won the bowling thing, but then again, their student body is mostly made of lily-white crackers from the hill country. The SEC has also won a total of 160 national championships since 1933. That is 2.162 National Championship a year. Impressive.

Not only that, the SEC has won a total of 23 National Championships in football in those same 74 years. That is once every 3.217 years. Plus add to this total the ten national championships that future SEC teams won before the conference was formed. Damn, thirty-three in one hundred and seven years. No other conference comes close. USC likes to say that they have won the most National Championships in football, but that is simply because they don't count Alabama as a team. Alabama has won three more than USC, by the way, if you count before the SEC was formed. If you don't, then yes, USC has won 13 and Alabama only 11, with USC getting 30 more years to do their damage.

I have read almost every article today on the 4-Letter and every single one of the articles, I could completely discredit, so I will just say this; if you are a betting person and you get your information from any source that is affiliated with ESPN, please call and get my checking account number. You can just deposit that money in my account and for you it is basically the same thing as wagering. You lose your money, but at least I am happy.

And, look at the underlined stuff on the frontpage of 4-Letter. Those are the items that made me laugh. Especially the Ron Zook thing. He's awesome according to ESPN, but he got f-i-r-e-d from Florida because he sucked. How far is the tumble from coaching Florida, one of the premier SEC teams to coaching the Fighting Illini of the Big-10? Uh, can you add to infinity?

How about the Notre Dame drops UCLA for the first win of 2007? I was reading this headline and thinking that the fans of ND would not have to watch their Irish play UCLA because they were dropped from ND's schedule. That WOULD be a win for Catholics everywhere. And of course the headline tells nothing about the story. One bunch of white dudes beat another bunch of white dudes. WOW!

Remember, here on this blog we have no problems telling the truth. Black football players are better than white football players. Is it a racial thing? Well obviously, because black football players are better than white football players. Okay, maybe there aren't a bunch of Black quarterbacks that are any good, but does the quarterback really do anything? All I can tell that he does is put his hands up the ass of a big white dude and then hand the ball to a black guy or throw the ball to a black guy. The real reason that there are few black quarterbacks is simply because black guys DO NOT like putting their hands in another dude's ass. For some reason, I am with the black guys on this one. Call me "Toby" on that one.

UPDATE at the same time I posted: The Big-10 has eleven teams, which brings to mind that Spinal Tap stuff. DiBergi: "Why don’t you just make 10 louder and make 10 be the top number, and make that a little louder?" Nigel (after taking a moment to let this sink in): "These go to 11."

WTW-International Version

Ever since I made the decision to increase the budget for our photography staff twenty fold, the payback has been enormous. I know that most folks think that White Trash only exists in the southern United States. Well, they would be wrong. Since Ronald Reagan first announced his candidacy for President of our country in sleepy little Philadelphia, Mississippi, we have been exporting our White Trash to the four corners of the world. And by the evidence in this photo, the export program has been successful. Our highly paid correspondent, Bean, sends this in.

What in Hell is the guy in the orange doing exactly?

Visit the rest of the White Trashers on the sidebar.

Quick, Put The Kids Inside, It's That Potter Kid!

I can't figure out what the big shitting storm is about the Harry Potter thing, but that could be because I have never read one of the books or seen one of the movies. Sorry, Harry Lovers, but a little flouncing wizard doesn't appeal to me; I would rather watch Waiting to Exhale, at least there are chicks in the movie. Seemingly, that would put me in the minority of the movie going public, but remember, the last movie that I went to see was Talledega Nights with Bean about a year ago.

The thing that causes me concern is the overwhelmingly gay dude that plays Harry. If there is a single person that thinks this Leslie boy doesn't smoke the pole, their gaydar is busted. Can't you just hear this fellow saying, "You know, Kevin, I think that it's time to slip into something more comfortable."? Understand this, if a guy plays a gay guy in a movie, he is gay. There is no more debate needed on this. Straight men don't play that crap; sure we might think about it for a minute but that's just because you women are so damn hard to figure out. Remember when that guy that played the gay sheep herder came out of the closet a few weeks back? Wow, shocker there.

Anyway, take your kids to see one of these movies at your own peril. I don't mean that having a gay child would be the end of the world, but it would at least be on par as them bringing home a person that wasn't the same race as y'all and man, how wrong is that?

And a grammar/punctuation question: Is my use of the semicolon correct here? I think that I want to start using that as much as possible if it is. Damn good looking piece of punctuation if you ask me and you did.