Excerpt from an actual conversation (a mindnumbing number of times):
Me: Can I ask you a question?
Two Dogs: Feh.
Me: How much do you love me?
Two Dogs: How in the mortal Hell can you quantify love?
Me: It's a simple question. Picture your love for me and create a measure for the vastness of its boundaries.
Two Dogs: I love you seven.
Me: I hope you die in a fire.
Prior Romance Lessons PART I, PART II, PART III, PART IV, PART V, PART VI, PART VII, PART VIII, PART IX, PART X, PART XI, PART XII, PART XIII, PART XIV
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