Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Fun for the Whole Family

While just sitting around the La Casa chillaxin' with the family, make it a point to engage the crumb-crunchers in meaningful debate. Most kids have no idea what in the Hell they are doing anyway, so you might as well try to mold them into something worth a flip. Might I suggest the following?

Print out the Governmental Code of Ethics that just so happens to be damn law and send the kids to the interwebs to find various violations to the code. Assign points for each infraction, taking extreme care to judge their "violations" by your parental ethics. Just so you have a frame of reference, I assigned one point per violation to my game, took four minutes and currently have 6,478 points. Do not let the kids come back with less than 100,000 points. This should get them out of your hair long enough to enjoy at least three Bloody Marys. Oh, and point out to these little people which political party that the violators have joined. Oddly enough, the Dems kinda lead my game with 6,472 points.

And the winner of this contest wins COLLEGE TUITION!!!!! The loser gets to move out immediately.

Code of Ethics for Government Service

House Document 103, 86th Congress, 1st Session - Passed by the Congress of the United States on July 11, 1958.


I. Put loyalty to the highest moral principles above loyalty to persons, party, or Government department.

II. Uphold the Constitution, laws, and legal regulations of the United States and of all governments therein and never be a party to their evasion.

III. Give a full day's labor for a full day's pay; giving to the performance of his duties his earnest effort and best thought.

IV. Seek to find and employ more efficient and economical ways of getting tasks accomplished.

V. Never discriminate unfairly by the dispensing of special favors or privileges to anyone, whether for remuneration or not; and never accept, for himself or his family, favors or benefits under circumstances which might be construed by reasonable persons as influencing the performance of his governmental duties.

VI. Make no private promises of any kind binding upon the duties of office, since the Government employee has no private word which can be binding on public duty.

VII. Engage in no business with the Government, either directly or indirectly, which is inconsistent with the conscientious performance of his governmental duties.

VIII. Never use any information coming to him confidentially in the performance of governmental duties as a means for making private profit.

IX. Expose corruption wherever discovered.

X. Uphold these principles, ever conscious that public office is a public trust.

I just realized that this game requires that you have two kids. Do not fret if you just have one. Send me your address and I'll send my boy over to play the game with your family.