Time to Try to Pick up Chicks

All my single friends have been talking about the best way to get the hook-up. I joined a website today that is sure to bring in the ladies. Wish me luck.

Gods Gifts to Women


Now, where did I put those condoms?

Thursday is Stupid.

Pretty much all the days of the week make sense to me except Thursday. Why in the world would someone decide to do anything on Thursday? Think about it. Monday, well everyone hates Mondays, Tuesdays are two fer. Two drinks, two songs, two Blue Plate Specials all for the price of one. Wednesday=Hump Day. Friday is the beginning of the weekend and usually payday. Dammit, everyone loves Friday. Saturday, you get to sleep late and do stupid things in the afternoon. Sunday is Mass and chicken, potato salad, and that congealed Jello crap on the lawn, then back to Manic Monday.

Thursdays suck. Why can't we have a free chicken and beer Thursday? Oh wait, we can.

FREE BEER AND CHICKEN!!!!

Relationships, DAMMIT!!!

I am not in a relationship, unless you can consider head in a moving vehicle that. However, it seems that all my friends are dealing with one of the big situations that come with being involved with someone. Marriage, unexpected pregnancy, husband=Mean Ol' Meany, wife=crazed monster. I am the ultimate king at complete failure at relationships. Why in the tee-total mortal Hell would someone ever come to me with a problem? Because obviously, they are even more screwed up than I could ever possibly be. God, please help us all.

How did the human race ever survive? Well, maybe it didn't and you are all here for my enjoyment. All humans are my life-sized action figures. Yay, look, free doughnuts!

I'm not bitching.

Life in the Factory

I spent the majority of my morning at a chicken processing facility in the backwoods in Mississippi. The people that run this plant are the backbone of our American society and it makes me proud to be associated with down-home folks such as these. Which begs the issue, do the people in Iraq have the intestinal fortitude to create the environment that we have in this country? I say yes.

Pray for the people in Iraq to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and let's hope it's not a freight train.

GI Joe

A friend of mine posted a link on his blog to GI Joe public service announcements yesterday and today look at this.

DrunkArchitect puts Joe in a bad place

Drunkarchitect virtually assured that COBRA would get into the terrorism game. Way to go John (Not my real name).

Here's the link to Drunk Architect's post, Go here RIGHT NOW, MEANIES.


Oh, and leave that alone, you'll go blind. Remember, you're Catholic.