Sunday, July 12, 2009

Footbaw - You Bet! (College Gameday)

I really have no idea where these guys play, the college name is Flarda State and I have never heard of it. I have looked through the entire schedule and the only place that I even see Flarda State is on the schedule for the Gates as their last game of the regular season.

Anyhoo, I think these dudes are walk-ons. Good thing, too. I mean if you only play one game a year, what is the use of having a bunch of scholarships and stuff?

So, everyone knows by now that the season of the reason for living kicks off on September 3, 2009 and it promises to be a doozy. FIFTY-THREE DAYS!!!! South Carolina's 'Cocks open the season with NC State and from there the season can only GET BETTER. Seems like I recall that NC State is "The Fighting Upholsterers," but I could be wrong on that.

I anticipate that for the 2009 World College Footbaw Championship Game, we shall have The Gates in the East and (Alabama or LSU, hmmmmm) GEAUX TIGERS! in the West. Here's another weird prediction that I am going to make, Ole Miss shall win eight games and lose in their bowl game, prompting calls for the firing of Houston Nutt. You know, since the Klansmen HATE, HATE, HATE black people.

On the HOME FRONT, I shall state for the record that I think that We Suck shall average 4.3 wins a season FOREVAH. But, I am certainly glad that they penned that SEC Championship Game National Championship Game onto the schedule. You know, since they have played in it EXACTLY ONE TIME since their last winning of the National Championship in 1941.

By the way, if you want a quick lesson in The How-Not-To of web design, Lesson Numero Uno starts at We Suck's schedule page. They should have just used My Space.

Let us now commence the p0wning of The Four Letter for the Google Search for COLLEGE GAMEDAY! (A tidbit of how far up the rankings we have to come this year, this blark is not on the first 20 pages of The Google. I guess last season's final polling doesn't count for this year, for COLLEGE GAMEDAY. And the BCS should be the exact same metric as The Google ranking for "College Gameday.")

Please take the time to comment. All comments MUST include the words, "College Gameday."

Oh, Sylvester Croom!


Andy said...

When is September gonna be this year?

I will be back to comment appropriately... Gotta go keep son from stopping up the toilet again...

My word verification isn't funny at all. Sigh...

Paul Mitchell said...

Andy, you forgot to include the words, COLLEGE GAMEDAY.

One more time, "college gameday" must be included in all comments!

ChristinaJade said...


That oughta trick thegoogle

Jill said...

a random sampling of spew from the libtard camp
@hbeeinc: HOO!hope you've got a lot of time to well as a lot of babies ;-)|| on zee bus. got a leetle time 2 day 4 #fetusfirsters

and they wonder why we DONT want them running the country?

Skunkfeathers said...

Libtards don't know squat 'bout footbaw. If it was up to them, there'd be no games, 'cuz it's not fair for someone to win. In libtard polling, UC Berkeley is tied for #1 with Wellesley.

Andy said...

COLLEGE GAMEDAY...happy now Paul?

Ole Miss will shock the world by winning 10 games. LSU will shock Baton Rouge by having no players arrested...winning 6 games, and firing Les Miles at the conclusion of a less than stellar coaching stint. Florida will win the BSCS championship again.

WE SUCK will beat LSU at Starkville, and shock the Golden Triangle. The Mississippi National Guard will have to be called out by the gay Gov.

It will evoke memories of Kent State when several rampaging looters (who had no idea that a football game had even taken place) are shot dead by the MS National Guard. CBS News will get it all on camera, and everybody at MSU will be fired at the command of Al Sharpton...along with everybody at LSU...and Haley Barbour and Bobby Jindal will have a joint press conference where they will both resign in disgrace.

Then they will join up with Sarah Palin on the Republican Governors Resignation Tour. They will all make a gozillion dollars, and retire to a small island in the Pacific (island yet to be announced).

Florida State will replace Bobby Bowden with a younger T-Rex as head corch. Bobby will continue to live for four million years, and retain the position as "corch emeritus."

As part of his agreement with Florida State, he will not eat any live humans, and will only scarf left-overs from old Seminole Indian graves. (I really shouldn't be ugly about Bobby. I've met him...and his best boyhood friend was a neighbor of mine...he's a helluva guy)

COLLEGE GAMEDAY. Crud...when is September gonna be?

And oh yea...Oklahoma will score 420 points against BYU in the opening game at the new Dallas Cowboys Stadium. The screaming crowd will empty out about mid-first quarter to beat the traffic back to Norman, and Salt Lake...

Save this comment for future reference. You heard it here first.

classicaliberal said...

I'm with CJ on this one! College Gameday BOOBS! Wow, they got themselves some talent at Flarda State! Go Semenholes!

I'll go stand in the corner for that one.


ChristinaJade said...

CL has COLLEGE GAMEDAY jokes! heh

So haw are we doing on thegoogle, Paul?

classicaliberal said...

2nd search page, 6th link down. By my count...


Denise said...

I have one COLLEGE GAMEDAY prediction for this, the 2009-2010 COLLEGE GAMEDAY season, and that is that one COLLEGE GAMEDAY college football team will win the BCS COLLEGE GAMEDAY tournament, and at least half of the COLLEGE GAMEDAY viewers will be pissed about the COLLEGE GAMEDAY teams playing in the game.

How's that?