Friday, April 08, 2011

A post about why I have been irregular with the posting...AND! Da Newz!

As most of y'all know, I have had a couple of headbutt run-ins with Comcast that has left my interwebz kinda intermittent. Hopefully, that is in the past. I do now have WIRELESS interblarq at my house. After a solid month. They has still yet to bury the cable in my yard, though. I am kinda freaked out that they didn't just hook directly into the existing cable in my house though. The new cable comes into the crib less than eight inches away from the one that was already here. Strange.

But, since this has turned into a "political" blog instead of the humor blog that it has always been, I had to back up and try to refocus on the things that we originally set out to accomplish. Anyhoo, on to the bashing of the Retarded President...

If you need any MORE proof of his incompetence, just look at this footbaw form. Right straight from the Lesson Plan of a six year old girl's diary. Holy shit, do you believe that there exists one human in the world that thinks that Barry is even remotely athletic?

Oh, his sport is basketball? Having only marginally played the game for a relatively short time, I would stuff the ball down his pencil neck throat over and over again. Barry Obama is a punk. He is the guy that leans against the lamppost outside the malt liquor bar and screams sexual obscenities at the young men that flounce by. A punk with no intellectual curiosity and a negative curve of upper body strength.

Let's check in on the happenings since we last spoke.

Food Stamp usage, a patently unconstitutional idiotic program, has increased by THIRTY PERCENT since The Moron was inaugurated. Surprised? You shouldn't be. This is exactly what happens when Democrats are elected. EVERY TIME.

By the way, according to President Dipshit, the FUTURE of electrical power is the technology from over 150 years ago. Again, this is not surprising. Democrats do not understand math, history, language, or science. Barry refuses to look into the REALITY of wind power. And in the off chance that Barry is having someone with an IQ exceeding 40 read this blog post to his dumb ass, here is some actual DATA for normal people to peruse.

By the way, Barry is doing EXACTLY what Jimmy Carter did thirty years ago. His concept is to cross his fingers and HOPE really hard that something CHANGES that allows us to refuse to deal with reality. In case you are wondering what Barry will be doing in thirty years, he will probably be heading to the places that HATE HATE HATE the United States IF the US survives four years of Barry.

And do you actually realize why the "Progressives" want to return to camel transportation and powering our lives with cow turds? It is because of their "faith" in global warming. No, I have no clue how "Progressives" survive a normal day when they are so absolutely stupid as to defy all possibility of them surviving a bath. They are so stupid that we had to start putting tags on electrical appliances so "Progressives" would not bathe with the toaster.

On the economy front, the very thing that everyone knew was happening four years ago, is finally getting airplay. Lemme just say, anyone that did not know that increasing minimum wage by almost fifty percent was going to have a calamitous effect on our economy doesn't need to leave the insane asylum.

Here's the shorter version of Barry's plan for the economy. It is hard to get around the point that Barry really doesn't understand that money COMES FROM SOMEWHERE. But, remember, Barry is the SMARTEST "Progressive." That means that he is an idiot.

Oh! Look at the comparison of the media coverage of W. Bush and President Moonbat. In case you are unaware, unemployment has increased by forty percent with President Changy McDumbass and gas has doubled.

Now, some simple observations on where to save some tax money. There are currently about 150MM people working in this country. We are carrying the load for a total of 330MM people, PLUS about 40MM illegal Mexicans, the majority of whom collect WELFARE. The "Progressives" say that those criminal Mexicans come here to work, but nothing could be further from the truth, they come here because they are criminal freeloaders.

There is a looming government shutdown coming today if the DC idiots do not figure out how to get blood from a turnip. Even the Republicans are proposing MORE spending. Now, keep in mind, this is the BUDGET FROM LAST YEAR. The budget that was never passed with a FULLY Democrat Congress and President Dumbo in charge. To blame this shutdown on Republicans is DISHONEST.

But, in good news, Paul Ryan, the mancrush of all normal people, has decided to be an honest, responsible adult and release a REAL BUDGET for 2012.

Dan Mitchell, no relation, on the Ryan plan v. the Obama stupidity.

Goldstein on the Ryan plan.

Marathon Pundit has the Ryan budget video, which is almost pr0n to normal people.

Also in the good news, the 1099 economy-crushing insert of ObamaCare, has been repealed and it appears that Dumbshit McStupidass will sign it. Whew! That was due to start this year and I would have closed my business doors instantaneously if it did.

It appears that the Democrats are going to shut down the government over Planned Parenthood funding. We did always know that the main platform for Democrats was baby slaughter, though. I have always wondered why Democrats hate human beings so much, since they are SUPPOSED to be humans...

Dean has a three part series on The American Roadmap. Part One...Part Two...Part Three.

Not all Democrats are in the Klan, but every Klansman is a Democrat.

And when the Democrats are looking for someone to lead their party, they go by IQ. The lower, the better. The only way they could have been MORE successful is to hire Donna Ladd from the JFP or Cynthia Tucker from the AJC.

Is there some kind of prerequisite to be a leader chick in the Democrat Party you have to be ugly enough to scare the maggots off a gut wagon? Here's the latest in a LOOOOOONG line of Democrat chicks that could make you unhungry when they brought the sammich. Damn!!! Kloppenburg is Geddy Lee!!!

More humor later. Promise....

Please take the time to comment.


innominatus said...

Suddenly I feel like putting all my Rush CDs in the microwave.

paul_mitchell said...

You *HAVE* to admit that she looks just like Geddy Lee.

The Mayor said...

That's NOT Geddy Lee? Man, that Kloppenburg is one ugly guy.

paul_mitchell said...

Mayor, that photo might actually be Geddy Lee. I was going back and forth with the photos and picked the one of Kloppenheimersmith that I thought was best.

Skunkfeathers said...

Geeee-awwwwwwd, Kloppenpuss is a fright. No WONDER the libtards want 'her'.

Cousin_Andy said...

TD, why does MOM take about 17 minutes to load? Maybe it's just me, but it is exactly 17 minutes, and when you go to comment, it is another 19 minutes. Probably just me.

Dude, I would love to get Barry in a game of roundball. He is probably a foot taller than me, and I am slight built. But, he would have another wart when we got finished.

paul_mitchell said...

It loads in 2.4 seconds for me, Cousin Andy. Are you on a MacApple or something?

I would pay good money to watch you and Barry 1 on 1. (By the way, I am in the 'That is a mole' camp.)

paul_mitchell said...

Skunks, (s)he looks just like all the other "Progressive" chicks. (S)he's ugly enough to make you not eat the sammich (s)he made for you.

Cousin_Andy said...

Well, it's probably just ME then. Of course, I don't have lightning fast
Comcast, so that must be the trouble. Dude, I'm not kidding here...when I
started thinking about taking ObozO on in a one-on-one (actually, I am a
damn good shot, and usually impress the young negro boys that wander into
the driveway...really, I do...I can go to the left in the paint...really, I
can...and, I NEVER MISS an18 footer. The young negro kids line up all the
way down to Smiff Screet for a chance at this old man. Seriously!)

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, I would first back in to Obozo at about
8 ft. from the basket (on the right side), and dribble with my left. That
would leave my right elbow free to catch him squarely under the chin. Now,
if I was playing against one of my neighborhood kids, I would just jab at
his nuts with my right fist, but we ALL know that Barry doesn't have any, so
the elbow to the chin would have to do. And, it's a big target, so that
should work.

Since he is a leftie, I would make sure to stomp on his/her/whatever left
hand as I make an easy layup.

Then, when he recovered, waved off the Secret Service, and came at me I
would say, "Yo Mama is a ho!" As he tried to dribble with his injured left
hand, I would taunt further, "Yo Mama was so white that...(and I'd go
through the litany of Obozo's white Mama jokes)"...then I would grab at
where most folks perceived to be male get injured easily. He probably would
not flinch, but if he did (from being told that he should), I would just
take the ball, and jam it in his face, making his flat nose even flatter.

That would mean that I had forfeited my chance at another basket. But, it
would be okay. Because, Obama is a pussy. I swear, I see the pussy
shooting baskets on the news...even with soldiers cheering...jeepers! The
dude is a pussy that any one of those guys could skunk. I know it is NOT
Christian to HATE anybody. So, I am probably going to go right straight to
hell when I did, because I truly HATE the guy. I tried to give him
grace...really, I did. But, the bottom of my Obama grace bucket rusted
completely out.

Cousin_Andy said...

"did" shoulda been "die." Crud...

paul_mitchell said...

Wow, I thought that I couldn't stand him. I'm forwarding this comment to the Secret Service.

Cousin_Andy said...

Forward away! Dude, I hate the guy like I've never hated before. And, I'm
not proud of it. I'm starting to think that God foisted ObozO on the
populace to test our Christianity.

I failed.


paul_mitchell said...

If you feel bad about hating Barry, just turn to Psalm 97:10 and all is good. Hatred is Biblical, dude.

Jill Guidry said...

That's a woman? Holy God.

paul_mitchell said...

That is actually Geddy Lee, but Kloppenstupid looks just like him.

Cousin_Andy said...

Okay, TD...I loaded your page from my GoobleReader, on my Toshiba netbook, hooked up on my wireless network. It took 9 seconds to load everything. When I clicked on the comments/reactions/whatever, it took 7 seconds. So, it must have something to do with my office comprutuh. But, your site is the only one that takes a full bathroom and smoke break to load up on my office comprutuh.

Heh! Don't go changin' to try and please me...come to think of it, that is just perfect timing for the three necessities of loading, nicotine, and urination.

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paul_mitchell said...

Andy, it is just not loading slowly for me at all. The comments were instantaneous, too. I do have a new blinking gif on the Sponsor widget, but it loads fast for me, too. Weird.

marc in calgary said...

Kloppenburg is definitely separated at birth from Margaret Atwood, who is taught at a few grades in all Canadian high schools. She owns ugly. She's the total Liberal.

I was flipping through the Tv talk shows before the advent of the internet, and saw a look-a-like as a stand in for Margaret Atwood on one of these shows, and each time the guy beside her turned to look directly at her, he leapt a bit in his chair, startled, as though he was totally surprised by her epic ugliness. It was the only funny part of the show I can remember and the audience loved it.

Everyone knew what the gag was all about.

paul_mitchell said...

Marc, after seeing the photos of Atwood, I had to check into the hospital it scared me so badly. However, Atwood bears a striking resemblance to the new Chairmonster for the Democrat party, Debbie Wasserman Schultz. Why are "Progressive" chicks so hideously ugly?

marc in calgary said...

I actually, seriously, believe that their ugliness is from within, not just a matter of physical unpleasantness.

paul_mitchell said...

Well, then it is certainly a Two-Fer because their ugly goes straight through to their bone marrow.

Thomas Ferdousi said...

We need more!

SH3 Chris said...

Kloppenburg strikes me as the love child of Ronald McDonald and the Wicked Witch of the West for the Wizard of Oz. Can you imagine waking up from a bender and rolling over and seeing that face OMG I would not be able to get to my handgun to kill myself fast enough. Either that or it would be the bender that made me give up drinking ;)

paul_mitchell said...

Thanks, Thomas. I have been running a little traffic test that requires my biting my tongue and not posting every day. But, I think that I am done now, so let the fun begin.

paul_mitchell said...

Chris, I have never, never, never been that freaking drunk, no matter how hard I tried. And I'm Catholic!!!

Roderick said...


How exactly is Obama stupid, he played the repubs for schmucks. There are only <500M of real cuts in the budget bill.

Is this a farce? The Ryan plan just pushes the hard decisions back on the states, DC doles out the block grants and the states figure how who they cut from the program.

This is just passing the buck, the losers in DC don't believe in anything except being re-elected. Do you really believe in Ryan? DC is worthless.

By the way are you going to check out "Atlas Shrugged" in the theaters? It is out this weekend.


paul_mitchell said...

Roderick, it took the Democrats decades to set us up at this point, it will take more than one budget compromise with the Party of Perpetual Stupidity to get things set back to right. The House passed Ryan's 2012 budget today with ZERO Democrats voting for it. Remember, the compromise they passed last week was the budget for 2011 that the Democrats, who held every part of the Fed refused to touch in an election year. Granted, the Republicans are not perfect, but they are nowhere NEAR as fucking useless as any Democrat.

The closest theater to me that is showing it is in Savannah. Crazy.

Roderick said...

So did you see it yet?

Just saw it this afternoon, impressive. Now I want to read the book before Part II comes out.


paul_mitchell said...

Roderick, I was too stupid to even look to see if it was playing here. It IS at Malco in Madison. I think that I am going to wait, though. I am glad that you are going to read it. The Fountainhead is a better look into my psyche, though.