Sunday, October 21, 2007

Two Dogs BCS Rankings Week Two

If you recall, we talked a little about how B-A-D the BCS is and how stupid sportswriters are last week. Today, I am going to try to channel stupidity to rank the BCS one day before it comes out. Trust me, I am NOT going to be close to the rankings because I cannot bend my neck far enough to get my head up my ass. I think that I pulled a rib muscle trying though because I go all out for my one blog reader.

Here we go, last week's rankings and weekend's outcomes:
1. Ohio State beat Michigan State 24-17
2. South Florida lost to Rutgers 30-27
3. Boston College-Bye
4. LSU beat 17. Auburn 30-24
5. Oklahoma beat Iowa State 17-7
6. South Carolina lost to Vandy 17-6
7. Kentucky lost to 15. Florida 45-37
8. Arizona State-Bye
9. West Virginia beat We Suck 38-13
10. Oregon beat Washington 55-34
11. Virginia Tech-Bye
12. California lost to UCLA 30-21
13. Kansas beat Colorado 19-14
14. USC beat The Catholics 38-0
15. Florida beat 6. Kentucky 45-37
16. Missouri beat 24.Texas Tech 41-10
17. Auburn lost to 4. LSU 30-24
18. Hawaii-Bye
19. Virginia beat Maryland 18-17
20. Georgia-Bye
21. Tennessee lost to Alabama 41-17
22. Texas beat Baylor 31-10
23. Cincinnati lost to Pitt 24-17
24. Texas Tech lost to 16. Missouri 41-10
25. Michigan beat Illinois 27-17

Now, we see from the list above that of the twenty teams that played, twelve won their games. And we had five teams with a bye. I can’t actually say that teams should move up if they don’t play, but well, this IS the BCS. Now, since I don’t watch every single college football game, although I HAVE tried, I shall only pick the Top Ten. Gimme a break, you try this, it ain’t easy.

The TWO DOGS Second Week BCS Shot-In-The-Dark
1. Ohio State, even though they barely beat Michigan State because they looked like they were trying to catch a greased pig, we simply HAVE to fluff them because that's what we do.
2. Boston College, even though they didn't play, they are a bunch of white guys that are bad at football and so are we.
3. LSU, since we have to give them rednecks one damn poll spot, well maybe two.
4. Oklahoma, since we have to fluff the Big-12, too.
5. Arizona State, PAC-10 and a BYE? Around the world baby! The only reason they don't get the number one spot is because of all the comments above, you know.
6. West Virginia, because we love, love, love the Klan and Robert Byrd.
7. South Florida, because they only lost to last year's darling.
8. Oregon, yessssss, PAC-10 and we can get USC up in the top five with a win over Oregon next week. We might even get them high enough to be in the Championship game again!
9. Kentucky, because they can't fall completely out with a loss to a Top-25 team, that would make us look stupid.
10. Virginia Tech, uh, because South Carolina has to fall a long way or we still have three SEC teams in the Top-Ten.

I think that this looks pretty damn good for a first timer, don't you? We will know tomorrow how good I did, though. I have to get a job working for the four letter.