Monday, November 19, 2007

Puhleeeeez, A Gut-Load of Math For You

As you all know, I read the Clarion-Ledger, the local Jackson dog trainer, every day with pleasure, just for sawdust and giggles. (Okay, I took liberties with that cliche'. Get your own damn blog, this is a family place. Well, a family that says "damn" alot, anyway.) What you don't know is that the folks that usually are chosen to publish on the "Letters to the Editor" page are equally as dense as the employees of the rag.

Okay, also know this, if it doesn't have to do with Mississippi and racism, it usually doesn't make the paper. You want links from today? All righty then.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. Each is a racism link, dude, just from today, and they are NOT op-eds. The search took me uno (1) second. Mere child's play. Posting the links to the individual articles took me three hundred (300) times longer.

Anyhoo, that is not the point of this post. Someone again vomited out the statistic that it costs more to put a murderer to death than it does to keep him/her incarcerated. Really? Let me simply say this, "You have not thought about this statement, you frigging moron." The only folks that could actually make that statement and believe it are pictured above. Oh, sorry Mr. Public Schooler, those two nutcases above are Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi and Cindy Sheehan, the anti-war mom. Really that photo was the only one that I could find on Google Images that showed the extent of stupidity that I want to point out. The collective IQ of those two people has to be pushing six (6).

Let's crack out the ciphering machine and make some educated assumptions for a minute. I have been in jail, I have designed many jails, and I have been on the construction crew of two jails. When I use the word "jail", it also is assumed to include county work farms, county jails, penitentiaries, regional detention centers, and federal prisons. I even worked on the very first private prison in the country. Let's just say that I have experience from every side of the damn jail business and leave it at that, okay?

'Da maff. Let's assume that you only serve one bologna sandwich a day to the prisoners. I know that you get more, but I'm making my point here by skewing the ciphering to bolster the idiotic point made by the letter writer. And let's assume that sandwich cost one US dollar. This means that $365 a year is spent to feed this killer, every year for ten years. And let's break down the cost of housing them forever. A minimum security bed costs about $20,000.00 dollars or it did two months ago when I bid that job, keep in mind, this is not a lockdown facility, it's a work camp. Let's add that in as one line, because it is completely paid for at that cost. Supervision costs money, too. Let's say Bubba Roy is assigned to cover you and 100 other guys at a cost of $15,000 every year for a maximum of ten years. That breaks down to $1500.00 for your sorry self. That should do it for the keeping you in jail person, it is surely a fraction of what it would cost, with medical care, activities, clothing, utilities, but you get the point. Reduced total cost for ten years: $25,150.00. Coupled with the fact that the doomed murderer that dumbass was writing about has now been locked up for twenty-two years, we have to double that figure and add some, it doesn't matter, the ten year figure will work just fine for our task.

The Torch Method: If we were to kill this murderer with AZT or the AIDS cocktail, which roughly costs five (5) dollars for nine capsules, wait that is expensive? K4s are 60 bucks per, let's kill him/her with that. Going from past experience, 100 K4s will kill a bunch of damn people, but we want our guy/gal dead, dead, dead.

That's six thousand ($6000.00) smacks. Total. For killing someone with something that relieves pain in advanced cancer patients. Reduces pain. Doesn't hurt. Not cruel. Humane. Blah, blah, blah. And the person that injects the lovable, little bad-boy can make nineteen thousand dollars for shooting him up and we still save 150 bucks. Let me be the first to volunteer for the shooter position as long as I can do it once a month. That would make me happy. I would make $228,000.00 gross per year. Okay, one time every two months. I am not greedy, there could be two of us. Hell, I would sub my killing out anyway, I have friends that would damn near pay me for the chance to kill someone legally. Man, I could be rich as Hell in no time flat. And I would carry my own insurance and retirement, pay my own milage and other expenses, too. Just think of all the money that I am saving our state, baby.

If you want to argue against the death penalty for strictly religious reasons, I would suggest that you start at a mosque, I think that would be fun for you. You could get those kissy-face Muslims to march with you protesting the death penalty. We would laugh and laugh and laugh.

Now, will someone get on that letter writing campaign to keep those stats that required me to write this post from ever being spewed again? Thanks, y'all.