Saturday, July 17, 2010

DUDE! Finally, the traffic is back to normal.

After catching Miss Muslim America exhibiting her pole dancing stripper skilz, I made the mistake of jumping on Teh Google to get traffic. (I am still numero uno for 'rima fakih nude.') After that traffic began to wane, I leaped upon the cell-tits-phone kickball chick. (I am still numero uno for 'larissa riquelme nude.') We broke traffic records for this low-level blog, doubling historical traffic in the span of one month. Since we have now finally come down from our ridiculous pr0n surfing pre-verts gazing, I can begin to develop legitimate traffic from our kinda people. Help me in this endeavor by sharing as many posts as you can to some of the big sites that can boost my bank account.

I make no qualms about what I am doing here. I now blog for the jack. This has officially become a money-making outfit. Get in on the ground floor and you too may experience the wealth creation machine that is MoM. WE GONNA BE RICH!!!

Just some brief updates on the various sites, here.

On MoM, we have always used this blog as a sandbox for all the stuff that we want to test. Yes, I have tried almost everything ever invented for web use on this blog. Bunches of stuff did not work at all and other things worked swimmingly. Everyone that reads this crap and comments on this crap should feel extremely proud of participating in my learning stuff. Y'all are true friends and I appreciate everything that y'all do to help me become more knowledgeable.

Y'ALL ARE SCIENTISTS!!! You should get your certificate suitable for framing in the mail from me very, very soon. We had some pieces of parchment left over from our last certification thingy and yours is in the MAIL!!! Sorry that it is so very large, I do not trust myself to cut the parchment down to a reasonable size. So, your frame needs to be 78 inches by 67 inches, minimum. I know that is a weird size and all, but such is the nature of parchment.

You should e-mail me your full name, address, bank account numbers, and medical records so I can get you your certificate. Hey! Look! I am just like the federal government!

Anyhoo, the website trial/teachy/techy thing is not going as well as I would like. It takes much time for me to figure things out because I am a moron and I do not want to upload anything that is LESS than PERFECT. So far, I have made one How-To video for a social media menu. Here are the reviews of that.

"Dude, that sucked HARD. Take me off the e-mail list, YOU FAILBOAT."

"Yeah, this is uninteresting, please never e-mail me again."

"Um. I hit 'Mark as Spam' on your last e-mail and I have no idea how to unmark as spam."

So, this venture is going as well as I thought it would! If you want on the Super Secret Private E-Mail List Only for Cool People, just hit me up at and I'll sign you up. I finally got to the point where Wordpress is uploaded to the server and I have my new blog address, too. Hopefully we can ramp up the development side of things.

I swear that next time I will not be making the How-To at four AM so I will be able to speak up and be myself rather than being quiet to keep from waking up the prison guards and my cellmate.

Here's a quick little DO THIS NOW thingy. I know that all of y'all use FAILbook, but some of you use Twittah, too. You do not need to use either of these services without accessing them through a client like TweetDeck, Seismic, or MarketMeTweet. The reason that I have switched from Seismic to MarketMeTweet is because I am going to ramp up my social media money grubbing and MMT has a great feature that will offer me more control of those spammy messages that I am going to send.

Here is one of the main reasons that I switched. Do you see the "Posted Via" link on the FAILbook and the Twittah? I am giving someone else traffic by giving them a link in my post. And all they are giving me is a way to post to a free website all the while grabbing links for PageRank, authority, importance, and reach.


With MarketMeTweet, I can add anyone to that line I want. I can link to my own site, like shown, or I can link to any other url on the WebbyNets. This develops links for my friends and gives them more VALUE and authority. Hopefully.

By the way, MarketMeTweet is not a free software. It is $119 and it is well worth the money for me. It features unlimited accounts on Twittah and unlimited pages on FAILbook.

AND if you buy it, I get some change!!! MarketMeTweet is a WIN-WIN for everyone, especially YOU, MY DEAREST FRIEND IN THE WORLD.

Please take the time to comment.


Andy said... all sounds Latin to me. But, I am completely, certainly sure that you know exactly what you're talking about.

And, I'm is very proud to be down on the ground floor, and soon to be really rich beyond my wildest imaginations.

I never did hear whether you liked the pie or not.

Paul Mitchell said...

I don't eat sweets at all, but Julie ate most of it and there is still one piece left. She must not have liked it as much as she said she did. I ain't much of a baker anyway, but what little tidbit I ate was pretty good.

Andy said...

Hey man, now that your traffic is back to normal, I've gotta tell you that I now have a brand new traffic horse.

Yesterday/today I have had about 400 hits from The Bing on "blobfish." Seriously. Evidently people loves them some blobfish.

They are hitting this photo:

It's nekkid and everything...

Skunkfeathers said...

You want my bank account? Dang, you sound like one of the lads from across the Pond ;)

'Sides, my REAL account echoes better than the Grand Canyon...

Andy said...

Skunks... "'Sides, my REAL account echoes better than the Grand Canyon..."

Glad to know I ain't in the club by myself.